Steve

Once upon a time there was a man and a woman who fell into something similar to love. They married and had a little boy and a little girl. He was only there for a while, but the wounds he left on the little girl would last for years. A while later a new man came along. He showed the girl that all men are not evil; but in fact most men are good. She did not need to be afraid of the dark, or some one hurting her, and he taught her how to pray. He not only showed her how to fish, check the oil, and change a tire. He taught her how true love could truly be; yes he loved her mother so. She saw with him and her mother that love is cruise across the sea or simply watching Jeopardy. That little girl just turned 19, and has begun looking for a love of her own. She has not found him yet but she knows how she wants it to be. That little girl is me.

Update

In my last post my life was in complete utter chaos. Well, things have improved just a tad. First off I am going to be allowed to stay on ASG on the terms that I will have a better GPA by Spring term. I changed my major to journalism. I have had 4 week of classes now and must say it fits my much better. My hobbies are writing and making videos and that's exactly what I am doing in my classes. I wasn't really fitting in in my classes last term with the nursing students. The only friends I made were in ASG. I went to my classes this term and first day I had ten new friends. Some one asked me today how I am liking my classes. I just laughed and said, "It's like they were made just for me."

Though I walk through the valley

I gotta face it, 2009 has been one of the hardest years of my life. Okay that may be an exaggeration, here's a better way of putting it. 2009 has been the most emotional year of my life. I started off the year with an outbreak of senioritice. I wanted out of high school so bad that I missed out on a lot of fun events just because I did not want to be at the school more than I had to be. I missed getting to ORU by missing 10 points on my SAT scores. I was so crushed. Then I felt convinced that I was going to CCC to turn it upside down and on fire for God. Well, I have had a blast having my beliefs challenged for the first time in my life, and getting to be the goody christian around my new circles, but it wasn't quite such a huge revival as I imagined. May I got my first job as a waitress in a retirement home. I graduated high school and felt on top of the world. I started working more hours and it made it impossible to go to church. Then I felt like one of those people who graduate then never goes to church again. I have been battling with myself over that a lot. Come September I had an idea for a story, I went with it, and now am thinking of publishing when I finish. Then the devastation hit December 16 when I got the results that I flunked 2/3 of my classes in college. Meaning so far my college experience has been a failure. Failing also meant that I lost my scholarship which paid for 1/2 of tuition, I will find out tomorrow if I am kicked out of ASG or not, and I am on probation with federal aid. School starts tomorrow and I do not meet the requirements of the classes I am in because of my failures. I have determined nursing is not what I want to do. I am now thinking some kind of video production. I think maybe that is why I didn't get the scholarship that would have sent me to ORU. Because I didn't know what I was doing yet. It would have cost me a lot in moving expenses and cost ORU a scholarship that could have gone to some one who had it figured out. Maybe once I figure out what I am doing things will be better financially. I have gained 30lbs since January 2009. Mainly because my addiction to facebook and my habit of emotional eating.
What are my goals for 2010? 1. Get better grades. 2. Figure out what I want to do. 3. Lose the 30lbs I gained(200lbs to 170lbs). 4. Finish my book. 5. Publish my book. 6. Get my GPA from 2.4 up to 3.5